Friendships, Fall-Outs & Personality Clashes;
It is a fact that we are not going to like everyone we meet and not everyone will like us. The assumption is that everyone at University, particularly those living in halls, will become best friends. However, we all have different experiences and backgrounds, have travelled a different path to get here and have a different moral and value base. These experiences are what shape our ‘window on the world’; how we view things, react to situations and behave is a direct result of our previous experience.
Many first year students will be ‘allocated’ their accommodation, which means they will be living with people they have never previously met. This can be difficult and initial friendships can deteriorate rapidly to uncomfortable atmospheres and fallouts.
Having discussions early in the tenancy is a good idea so that everyone is clear about individual expectations. At this stage it is easier, as everyone is still keen and excited, and hopefully haven’t already fallen out. Even if you don’t always agree, being able to agree to disagree is a good start and can enable negotiation to reach a compromise that you can all live with.
You can still be civil to, and live with, flatmates or neighbours in a pleasant environment, even if you can’t be friends.
Fall outs can happen over the smallest thing, someone ‘borrowing’ your toothpaste, or eating your food can really irritate. Don’t bottle things up, deal with the issue straight away in a calm manner.
Refer to How to Communicate for tips, or for more information, hints and tips please have a look through the Tenancy Support Guide.